**Please excuse my incoherent rambling I'm just really excited and life is amazing. **
My Christmas card.
So mom actually introduced me to a pretty cute guy that is actually her roommate from college's son. He is studying abroad atm and is studying economics and we get along really well, actually. Anyway dad made 抓饭 for lunch then we went to a plastic surgery center (long story) where there lived a bunch of stuck up employees and then went shopping and h&m where I bought a white sweater and a button down and then I treated us to 麻辣烫 and we had dessert and took the subway home and it was just a really happy superb day. Lots of smiles and laughs. My favorite kind of day. I am still smiling okay.
All the Chinese people accepted to Cornell ED made a little 微信群 and I got to know some of my future classmates and friends. Wifi is quite amazing, no?
My dance team and I are meeting up Tuesday and going downtown for dinner then karaoke then watching the ball drop, so to speak. Super excited, I never get to hang with my girls outside rehearsal or performances! This is actually the last year we will all be together, since 思洋 is leaving around the same time I am next summer, and everyone else will be busy with college or grad school. They've been such a huge part of my life and I'm so grateful to have met such gorgeous beautiful souls.
So. My Christmas miracle. Just some thoughts I think are very relevant. The past couple days have been some of the happiest in this year. Partly because of current events, partly because I am actually living. Without the ridiculous constraints I previously held myself to. I don't have to wear makeup to be pretty. I can eat out every meal and not be fat. I can eat sugar and gluten and oil without dying or it having any negative effects on my health. I can go out with friends and eat what they eat and go where they go and actually have fun without thinking about what time I must be home or how I must skip ice cream. I can talk to guys and they will like me cause I'm a great person, not because I'm a specific size or eat really clean. In fact everyone says I look better; my skin is glowing, my cheeks have color, I feel energized, I sleep better, I don't wake up hungry, I enjoy food, and believe it or not I am not fat. There is so much more to life than body shape. YOU are worth so much more than that, you must accept yourself to start truly LIVING and loving others. Try it. It's hard but totally a mindset switch that feels freaking amazing. Set yourself free. You are in control. Forget calories and macros and all that. Society might make it seem normal and whatnot but it's not. Because life is so much better unconstrained by those numbers. Mental health is so important, not something to be ignored just for a goal body. Don't let it become an unhealthy obsession. Don't forget to achieve equilibrium and enjoy life, this will be the best time of your life and you don't want to miss it because you're afraid.